baby maybe someday
2003-08-19 Liz talks about Eddie.

Okay, so I told yall that I was going to write about all my ex-boyfriends in a little series thing.

So, tonight I'm going to talk about Eddie. My first boyfriend, ever. Sure, there were other boys before Eddie that I had crushes on. My first date was with a guy named Larry. He was someone I knew in kindegarten, and I got curious about him and called him 7 years later to see what he was up to. He was HOTTT. Unfortunately, I was like 11 years old and had no idea what appropriate date-wear was, so I met him at the mall in my Headbangers Ball t-shirt and black leggings. He bought me a Metallica tape and we never spoke again.

But that's not Eddie. Eddie was my first official boyfriend, introduced to me by my good pal Ali-Kat Alison.

Here's the story as I remember it: Ms. Ali-Kat and I were in orchestra together. She was friends with Eddie and Eddie apparently needed himself a woman. She picked me because I was hardcore and wore Nine Inch Nails shirts and she thought I would be good with him. So, not only did we form a fast friendship, I was them introduced into the world of Eddie-ness.

Now, at 13 years old, I wasn't exactly a catch. I had a hair situation. My bangs were growing out and I always had to wear a headband. If I wasn't wearing a handband, I was wearing the always fashionable Guns N Roses hat. I was overweight, I was totally socially retarded, and I was just plain ugly. Okay? Let's just get serious and know that I was just ugly. I needed to have eye surgery cuz my eyes were all weird and I didn't have that for another year or so, so I was just really not pleasant to look at.

So I first meet Eddie by talking to him on the phone. I remember our first conversations.. 3 ways with Ms. Kat. I remember the first convo we had. I was grounded because of my bad grades. I wasn't allowed to listen to my stereo, which was death back then, and I couldn't watch TV. But I could talk on the phone! AHA! So we talked. We all talked on the phone A LOT. Everyone had three-way, so there'd always be like 6 people on the phone at a time. And there was always the fun "Let's call Elizabeth on three way and not tell her that Eddie is on the phone" trick that was oh so cool at the time. The fun part about that was when Ms. Kat called me for the first time, she asked me what hair color I liked on a guy or whatever, and I was all,"Anything but blond!" Of course Eddie was listening. And of course Eddie was blond. Oh, how I miss three way.

That was my first entrance into the World of The Cool.

The people I met through Eddie were some fascinating people. People that I never would have known without the benefit of him. They generally lived in shabby apartments, had abusive parents, smoked a lot, and just lived on the edge. It was kind of "the wrong crowd", but other than lying to my mom about where I was sometimes, I never divulged in the bad stuff. Like, one day they had no cigarettes between any of them, so they were actually trying to smoke like.. pieces of grass or something. It was all very pathetic.

Eddie himself wasn't quite the big catch I made him out to be at first, either. First of all, he had a mullet. Which I guess was acceptable back in 1993 so I can't really say too much about it. What I loved most about him was that he was 15 and to a 13 year old girl, a boy with long hair two years older than me was just the coolest thing in the world. IN THE WORLD!

I remember what I was wearing when we had our first kiss. I was wearing a green shirt and blue jeans. And it was in front of the One Way sign at Lake Highlands Junior High, and it was right after school. I thought I was the shit, making out with a boy 2 years older than me. Oooh boy.

Eddie had some drama in his life. I once had to call 911 for him because his dad was beating him up. He also wanted to run away to Florida or something shortly after we first got together. He was the first boy in a long line of them in my life who dropped out of 9th grade. But I didn't care about that at the time. I thought I loved him. After knowing him for like 3 weeks, I announced to everyone that I loved Eddie, oh yes.

My first big make out movie was Somersby. He felt me up, and I was all like, "Aww yeah, I'm getting felt up." He came over to my house and we watched Wayne's World and he felt me up again while my parents were in the next room. But that was as far as it went. No under the clothes stuff or anything. I wasn't the horny hussy that I am today back then.

He carved my initials into the palm of his hand with a razor. I wonder if he has a scar from that.. I bet he's all like, "Who the hell is EG?!" these days. I don't think I left a permanent mark in his heart. Awww, that sounded so dramatic. Our "song" was "I would Die Without You" by PM Dawn. Eddie did not die without me. After he dumped me, he had a 9th grader named Tricia, someone even uglier than me (I'm sorry, it's true!), all lined up.

We went out for a drama filled 3 weeks and then he dumped me at the skating rink. I tried to assault the girl that I thought he was dating, and I actually had to physically be held back so I wouldn't attack the poor girl. We got back together the next day, but that only lasted for another week and then I was dumped again.

The lesson I learned from this drama filled tragedy is that people are not always what they seemed. I met people that I certainly would not have met if it weren't for Eddie. I learned that even though I hated stereotypes, I was certainly making enough of my own, but these people defied those. They were cool, and they accepted me, and that was all I wanted back then.

And I got a life-long friend out of the whole ordeal, you can't really complain about that. I also got a flair for poetry writing. I must have written about 100 poems about Eddie, and for years after that, I have notebooks and notebooks full of horrible poetry. A girl has to get through her first heartbreak somehow.

Anyway, that was the sad story of Eddie. It is because of Eddie that my list of boyfriends includes a whole lot of long-haired, blue eyed drop outs. Well, that's because of me, but anyway.

Yay.

Next: The story of Charles, the boy who dumped me for a boy.

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