baby maybe someday
September 15, 2003 Liz hates her significant other.

OMG! One of my favorite Friends was just one! The one with the prom video! Yay!

Okay, sorry.

Today, I am feeling okay. Not wonderful. Because I haven't talked to Matt in almost 2 days and I'm really getting irritated about the whole thing. But I'm thinking that I'm okay until I let one bad thing happen, and then it's just a whole spewage of self-esteem issues, but then good things happen again and I'm okay. It's a fun cycle.

I really want to yell at him. I want the ultimate confrontation. I want to scream. I want to say things that I'll probably definitely regret later. But I'm scared of that. And that makes me a loser. But I bet Unsentletter will get a visitor tonight. And that visitor will be me.

I am wondering about seeing a psychiatrist. First of all, I called like.. 5 of them today and none of them seemed to work out. They either don't schedule appointments for new patients until the end of the week, or they don't take my insurance, or they can't see me until the end of October.. I want my drugs, people! And I want them now.

I also still wonder if they'll give me the drugs after I see them for the first time or if I have to keep going back. Bah.

I cried a little today when I had to stop for a funeral procession. It was sad! But then this really hot guy on a motorcycle drove by and yeah. Wow, was a he a hottie.

I wish I didn't have writer's block. I want to say that the chemical imbalance in my brain that's causing me to be such a freak is also causing the creative part of my brain to just not work, but that's pathetic. I can still write. I shouldn't use that as an excuse. Tonight, I am going to Barnes and Noble, and I'm going to use some of that time to write a short story. I want the theme to be the title of this very diary.. "If you need me, I will find you." I find that quote to be so intriuging, and maybe if I really thing about it, I can get a short story out of myself. I hope so.

I think the bank that I go to got robbed today, by the way. I went there to cash a check that my mom gave me because she doesn't want me to be poor, and I couldn't, cuz the Crime Scene Unit and the police and the news people were there and there was yellow tape around the building. If that's not fun, I don't know what is.

I've added a few people to my favorites in the past week or two because the list was getting too short and I wanted more entertainment. But it's such a rare event that I actually add people (I usually go months without doing that), so let me introduce you to a few of them:

Owcowkee
Emiline220
Just-Jenn
Ems00
Zoobomb

Yep. I was going to add fun little descriptions, but that part of my brain is currently occupied by ineptitude.

I think I'm getting my period. That would be fun!

I have included some annoying quizzes in this entry because I like to annoy people. Have fun!

*****

What was Liz doing a year ago?

"So, me and BB had a fight last night. Our fight that we drag down from the shelf every 3 months. We both have roles in this fight, and we play them well. It's almost like a script now, because the exact same things are said, the exact same things are agreed upon, and the exact same things never change. It's really a pointless waste of 45 minutes, but sometimes these things happen that way."

What was Liz doing 2 years ago?

"I also watched the news quite a bit. When I see things about people giving much to the victims, when I see the generosity that so many people thought America had left behind, it always makes me cry. Every single time. And especially when I see other countries crying for us. When I saw the London people playing the Star Spangled Banner instead of God Save the Queen, it makes me cry like a baby. Well, not like a baby, but it brings a tear to my eye. I want to cry. I want to cry hard, until I can't cry anymore, but I don't know."

*****


I'm Rachel Green from Friends!

Take the Friends Quiz here.

created by stomps.



Which Season are you?

A pirates life for me...
Which Pirates of the Carribean character are you? Find out @ RelentlessDivas.Net!

I'm Annette
Which Reese Witherspoon are you? Find out!

a href="http://www.relentlessdivas.net" target="new">Oh YES! I'm SLUTishly HORNY!
How Horny Are You? Find out!

Heaven
You come from Heaven. You're the purest of pure, a
saint. You're probably an angel sent directly
from Heaven.



Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by Quizilla

Heaven
You come from Heaven. You're the purest of pure, a
saint. You're probably an angel sent directly
from Heaven.



Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by Quizilla

Earth girl
You are a true nature girl!



Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



back & forth random
recently...

So be it! My last entry ever. - November 16, 2004
701 - October 17, 2004
Buh bye: An Austinliz thesis - October 03, 2004
war of the roses - October 01, 2004
fucking debate! - September 30, 2004