baby maybe someday
October 14, 2003 I fell in love with a boy. A boy named Stormy.

I just have so much to say that I don't even really know where to start!

Let's start with porn.

Matt gave me his DVD player because he never uses it, and mine is broken. So I brought it back here and by some kind of miracle, I actually set it up correctly. I celebrated this feat by going out to rent some porn! Because I am a deviant pagan like that.

I haven't rented any porn for at least 2 months, but the completely sad part about that is when I came up to the counter to do the renting fun, the dude there already knew my name AND license number. Without me having to tell him. After not being there for 2 months. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

*sigh*

My reputation precedes me, apparently.

Anyway, before that, I went to a "group interview" at Lane Bryant. This is where they invite everyone who applied to work there to a big mass interview. If they like you, I guess they call you later for a one on one interview. I really think it would be kinda cool to work there. Plus, the 40% discount helps.

And if you're wondering, yes, the majority of the girls there were.. bigger. As am I. And you could tell that we were the majority and felt pretty good about ourselves, because the 2 skinny people were made outcasts and had to sit in the back. Heh! Fat power. Yes, I'm a dork.

Okay then. That brings us to continue the birthday festivities recap. Aren't you excited? I know I am.

I fell in love over the weekend. I miss him already. His name is Stormy, he's 13 years old, and he's a horse. I visited my mom's horse with her on Sunday, and Stormy was just hanging out, looking fantabulous. It took a little while, but we bonded. We were actually snuggling at one point. If you've never snuggled with a 1,000 pound animal before, I'd really suggest it. It's interesting.

For dinner on my birthday, my mom made me cream chicken with mashed potatoes, green beans, corn, and rolls. I can't tell you how much I love this little bit of culinary brilliance. It is so.good. I could not get enough of it, seriously. After that, I had some cake! It was really really good cake! My mommy spoils me.

I then went to hang out with Natalie. I really didn't like Denton much while I went to school there, but now that I don't, I'm beginning to appreciate it a little more. I appreciate the little things, like how I actually spotted Natalie in her little Jeep Cherokee driving along at the same time I was, going to the same place I was, about 5 miles from where we were going to meet. I honked at her and it was very exciting.

Anyway, we went to the little cafe at Hastings, and as usual, I was introduced to about 3 different people within 5 minutes of getting there. Natalie knows everyone. In the whole entire world. And I can definitely respect that.

Previously that day (I know this is all over the place but I just have a bajillion things to say) I went to Barnes and Noble, and after that, I bought a toothbrush and lottery tickets at 7-11. I won $13 on them, and was pretty happy about that. I went to a different store after that because I'm weird, and I traded those tickets in for a $10 ticket, wherein I then won a lovely $50. I felt good about this. I felt like karma was saying "It's okay now. Just chill. The worst is over." Obviously the worst isn't over, but I feel so much better about life in general right now.

Especially after the whole Matt thing transpired. I'm really glad I called him, and not because I got some fantastic nookie AND a DVD player, although that helps. I'm glad because before that, I was stewing with anger. I felt like it was a good, productive anger, but it wasn't good for me. And now I just have a pleasant demeanor, a happy one, "relieved" is really the word I'd use.

I didn't waste much time doing a lot of soul searching about the past year, the year of 23 years old. It doesn't take much smarts to understand that this year was obviously a very challenging one. 2 weeks after turning 23, I got dumped. 2 months later, I graduated from college and was removed from the life I had gotten way too comfortable with. I then moved to a place where I didn't really know anyone. It's been a crazy year, and I want to say that I've learned a lot from it, but I don't really think I can claim that until I move back and prove to everyone that I actually did learn something.

I do feel better. A lot better. And almost every friend/family member I encountered this weekend told me that I looked/acted better. Matt told me that I was "looking good," Natalie told me I looked like I lost weight, Donna said that she and my dad both thought that they could really tell a difference in my attitude, and it was quite refreshing to everyone. And really, the stripper was quite excited to spank me. So, I feel good. And I hope this continues because I don't want to feel bad anymore.



back & forth random
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