My roommate is making me all kinds of nervous. The almost 6 months we've been inhabiting the apartment together apparently has not made her completely aware of my total social retardation.

She's basically putting me in charge of her boyfriend's surprise party on Saturday night. That would probably be easy for a normal person, but for me, I'm already growing hives in preparation for totally stepping out of my comfort zone for this party. I already have no idea what I'm going to do there anyway.. first of all, it's at Hooters. Second, I know none of her friends. Help. Anxiety. Attack. I know I need to get out there and be social and that's why I'm going to this, but damn! To like, be in charge of it? My roomate must have lots of faith in me to give me all this responsibility.

But then again, she just bounced her rent check, so responsible might not be the word we're looking for here.

I just thought I'd share that.

Also, PD the puppy dog is FINALLY getting fixed tomorrow. He seriously has the biggest balls of any dog I've ever seen, so I'm happy about that.

Also, Matt just got into a doctorate program at some weird little online school. I know in the back of his mind he must know that getting a doctorate from an online school is probably not the greatest idea in the world, but hey, whatever blows his skirt up. Someday he'll be Dr. Matt and I'll still be looking for a job.

I'm bored here at work and I would like to do a survey-like thing. Yeah. Stolen from her because I like to steal things from her.

The Sexiest:

Movie: Going for the obvious, I'd say Threesome with Lara Flynn Boyle, Josh Charles, and Stephen Baldwin. Man, that movie is hot. Also, Gone in 60 Seconds because damn, those cars turn me on!

Band/Music: Hmmm. If you're going for crazy intense heavy metal sex, there's always room for the GN'R. If we're going for romantic, I'd probably say some old school Billy Joel would work.

Letter: X

Number: 31

Food: An ice cream cone has been known to stir up feelings that I shouldn't be having. Also, steak. Because it's a manly man food! Grar! Steak!

Beverage: Wine has a pleasant effect on my liver.

Ass: I'm not much of an ass girl, but there are two that come to mind: the Marine-like guy who stood in front of me at the Tom Petty concert in 1995, and my gay French teacher my sophomore year in college. And Axl in those weird little biker shorts he used to like so much.

Face: I have to go the dork route here and say as far as faces go, my Mattieboobear has a nice one. My gut reaction to this one was Sebastian Bach, because holy lord, he's one sexy man.

Color: Nothing sexier than black.

Word: Liquid. Monkey. Vehicular Manslaughter.

Sound: I could go obscene here, but no. The sound of a boy who knows how to play his guitar is super sexy to me. Slash, I'm talking to you.

Body part � Fingers. And arms. Ryan had some fucking incredible arms, my god.

Job Does Guitar Player count? God knows I love me some guitar players.

Also....

Most Annoying:

Music video: Do those fucking Fanta girls count? I hate those cunts. I'm trying to think of others but I don't see a whole lot of music videos these days. Slither is a good one, though!

Song: "Whiskey Girl" by Toby Keith has to be the WORST SONG EVER. Seriously. I hate that song more than I've ever hated anything in my whole life.

Task I have to perform at work:

Yesterday my boss decided to apparently punish me for taking a week-long vacation and I had to file. All.day.long. I didn't even get to open my computer (they don't have a computer here for me so I have to bring my laptop everyday) until 4:00. Fuck filing. Filing sucks.

Television commercial: I saw a musicspace.com commercial for GN'R's greatest hits CD! What the fuck! That's just not right.

Sitcom: I apparently love all sitcoms because I can't think of any. Maybe Seinfeld, even though that doesn't make me a very popular person.

Sitcom character: Steve Urkel is pretty high up there. Maybe Elizabeth Berkley on Saved By The Bell.. she was pretty sucktacular.

Coin: 50 Cent piece.

Time of day: A tie between 7:24 in the morning (when my alarm goes off) and 1:00 PM. I hate 1:00 PM for some reason.

Rock on.

*****

a year..

"So, today at work, apparently my ovaries got in the way of being able to take a call properly. A man I was speaking to actually asked, "Is there a man in the building that I can talk to? That would be great." Brilliant. Great. I didn't realize there were still modern humans that exist like that. Thankfully, he hung up on us soon after that. I got hung up on twice today! I am so proud."

2 years..

"Anyway. I think I'm becoming a lesbian. BB has always said that he thinks I'm 99% lesbian. Isn't that cute? But when I worked out with my personal trainer on Saturday, I just thought she was the cutest thing I've ever seen! I wanted her to have my children because she would probably be a good mom. I kinda wanted to go home and get BB and introduce him to her, they would probably make a cute couple! I don't know. I'm a dork. And my french teacher is kinda cute too. She has purple hair! How cool is that! And such."

3 years ago..

"I have been advised by an entry in my guestbook not to email Math boy. I happen to agree. I just need to let things go. If something was meant to happen, I'll see him on campus someday. And if he cared, he would have found my email address or something. So now I'll just go find some other math tutor to have a crush on."