And I understand the point. I understand that what I'm doing is unnatural to my feelings. I understand that I feel like we can be the exception to the rule, the one couple of out 100 that could make it, and I understand how stupid that makes me seem in the eyes of people who know better. I know that I'm just asking for another heartbreak, and I shouldn't let him get away with it, I'm weak, I'm mushy, I'm juswadoing it because it's easy, I let people walk all over me, you know.

I know all this. And you know what my answer is? I love him. I've always been a romantic, too much so, and that's my only answer. I love him. And I want to see what happens between us. I want to beat a dead horse, teach an old dog new tricks, because if I don't, I just won't be happy. Maybe it won't work out. Maybe I'm too young to realize that people just seriously don't change. But I'm not jaded enough to think that yet. And you know what, if it doesn't work out, at least I'll know it's over for good. At least I know I gave it my best shot, 100%, and at least I'll be able to move on for good.

Call me crazy, call me dumb, but that's just how I feel. I love him. I believe in him. I believe in us. I believe in love. That is how I am. That was how I was raised. And until I am proven wrong, this is what I'm going to be.

And that is all I have to say for now.