First of all, my ass hurts like a motherfucker. I told Kyle the Personal Trainer the other day that I felt like my ass was being neglected in these workouts, and he apparently took me seriously because yesterday was all ass, all the time. Woo! The cheeks are hurtin!

Second, finally the temp agencies came through for me. I joined like 10 of them, and one of the first ones finally found me a secretary-like job that pays $8.50 an hour. I'm excited. Finally a steady job (it's from 7:30 to 4:30, which I'm not ecstatic about, but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do) where I can work all day, go work out, cook dinner, and write my novel. It's really a relief. I'm nervous because I hope I can do what they ask me to, but it shouldn't be too hard. I start on Tuesday. I would have started on Monday if I didn't tell her I was out of town until Monday.. I told her that just in case Matt actually wanted me to go to Mardi Gras with him.

*sigh*

Third, I am actually losing weight. I have two different scales.

1. The first scale was the one that first told me I was over 200 pounds. Today, that same scale told me I was 176 pounds. I didn't believe it, so I did it like 3 times, and it said the same thing.

2. My other scale, a digital one, said 180 today. The other times it said 180 I would step back on 2 or 3 times and it would go back to 184, but today it was 180. That same scale told me I was 192 when I first got to Austin. 12 pounds in 2 months.. that's not bad, eh?

I know that sounds like I'm getting a little crazy with the scales, and I probably am. The scales are going into the closet for the entire month of March. Hardcore March, damnit!

But it's almost surreal.. I am actually losing weight. I am doing what I set out to do here in Austin.. trying to feel better about myself. My jeans that I bought 2 weeks ago are already sagging a little, I have to pull them up alot.

So what I'm trying to say here is that I'm proud of myself, god damnit.

Thank you.

Fourth.. I really wish I was at Mardi Gras. I've been to every one of them for the past 4 years, I even got a little crazy with the boobs the first time I went. It's not really the event of Mardi Gras itself.. I actually don't really dig the whole walking down Bourbon Street amongst the crazy lunatics all day. But just being with Matt in Louisana, having a hotel room, going to little parades in Baton Rouge.. we had our little routines and it was so much fun.

But I told him.. "Oh well, there's always next year," and he said "True, just think how much fun we'll have together next year." I hate when he says stuff like that.. it's like he's optimistic that we're going to be together next year even though there's no guarentee that will happen.

But I'm done crying for a while. No crying in March, damnit. It's gonna be good times in March. It's going to be Hardcore in March. Matt will not mess with my emotions in March.

But I will get him back. I saw Two Weeks Notice today (again) and the chick from You've Got Mail told Sandra Bullock that she had to fight for her man, and it was worth it. I'm going to fight for him.. he is what I want, as sad as that is. Maybe I won't get him now, or a month from now, but someday, he'll be wanting some Lizzie Love.

My goal today was to see Gangs of New York, but I was bored and I saw about an hour of Old School before I snuck into Gangs. Dude.. Gangs of New York bored the living fuck out of me. I left after probably 30 minutes. Good god almight, did that movie suck some serious ass.

I'm going to Dallas next weekend. Not for Matt.. I think he's going on a road trip or something. I'm going to my dad's farm, I think. It should be good times.. I'm looking forward to seeing my puppy again and showing up and looking like I've lost 12 pounds (16 pounds if I believe my other scale) and it'll be fun. Yay.

Anyway.. I ordered a pizza (since tomorrow is the start of Hardcore March, I decided to treat myself!) and I'm going to watch the special edition of Dogma, so I think I'm settled in for the night. My life is just way too exciting.